Yes, the question is relevant. Think about it. Very often the love we express through hugs is projected towards the outside of us: to our partners, to our children, even our parents, siblings and friends. Yet, how much does the theme of this month, ‘let’s hug’, also include embracing the love for our life, embracing every part of ourselves without compromising, and declaring that hugging is just as much about self-love as it is about compassion for others?
Hugging does not just include a physical component. Yes, putting the arms around someone else already allows us to determine a certain degree of intimacy between two people in their relationship with each other. Or, how often do you hug strangers? Mind you, maybe this is what the world needs right now: more hugging strangers. But that is a question for another time.
If you hold someone, it implies that you have a deeply rooted emotion for the receiver of your hug. The bodies touch on a heart level, so your act is out of compassion and righteousness. An intimate act of joy, of love; of demonstrating your feelings for, and sharing with someone.
Now question this! Hugging is about the word “embracing”, and pulling someone closer to you. Yet, how close do you let the person who really is closest to you, inside? Of course, I mean to say how close do you really let yourself in? How often do you hug your own soul?
Self-love, and embracing (aka hugging) yourself in all your glorious mess and perfect imperfections, is not an act of selfishness or egotism. Quite the opposite. Where love prevails, there is no ego. And where there is love, it just is. Meaning that you also honour yourself, and show just as much compassion towards you, as to someone outside of you.
Can you learn self-love? Yes. Can you feel self-love? Yes. Can you accept self-love? Yes. The teachings of Kundalini Yoga, as brought to us through Yogi Bhajan, give us many holistic approaches, technologies, meditations and lectures on how to overcome the ego and act from a place of compassion and love.
Love what you understand is very different than what love is. In the 1994 Espanola lecture, Yogi Bhajan talks with his students about the subject of love. I would like you to read this extract and reflect upon what it means to you personally:
“You have sensual love, you have sexual love, you have personal love, you have conditional love, you have unconditional love and you can call the love with anything. Actually, love is a self-acknowledgement. When I love myself, I can be so rich, I can love everybody. The depending love, that because you love me, you depend on me and I love you, I depend on you and because I expect, in business now I expect this, you expect this, this is not, that is not love, that is called, what you can call it? Softening the way. Meaning something different, doing something different. Love is the most abused one word in the human vocabulary. Because first condition of love is when you are in love or you love somebody you have no question to be asked. Where there is a question there is no love. Where there is a condition, there is no love. Where there is an expectation, there is no love. Where there is jurisdiction, there is no love. Where there is a territory, there is no love. Which can be defined and have dimension has no love.”
Love has no conditions and no expectations. Is this new to you? If you put expectations onto your love, then it’s not love.
Life is a flow of love, only your participation is requested. Love is an experience of oneself within oneself. It is self-fulfilment, it is self-attainment, it is self-containment, it is self-enlightenment, and it is self-beauty. The love you feel for yourself is gorgeous, beautiful, and blissful. Like the beautiful person you are.
As a Kundalini Yoga teacher and a Life Coach, the number one thing I recommend to anyone who wants to change their life is to practice meditation. No, you don’t have to be a monk, and it does not matter if you have never meditated before. You can learn. Scientifically speaking, meditation has many benefits, and even as little as a couple of minutes a day can really help you improve Your Life.
What are 10 minutes of your day? They are nothing in comparison to the manifold results of the experience. If you don’t have just 10 minutes of the day to yourself, to sit in silent with yourself and listen to your breath and your heartbeat, then what is Your Life – what are you – worth?
You are everything and everything is you. Embrace yourself – and when you hug someone you love, don’t forget to include yourself in your compassion.
May the longtime sun shine upon you!
Melanie Reid – HealthyLux Passionate Contributor
HealthyLux December theme – Let’s hug